mychai's Diaryland Diary

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We at JP-Land wish you allah the best!

Am I supposed to write a holiday-themed diary entry? I've never had a holiday-themed diary entry before.

How about this....

When I was really little -- like 4 or 5 years old -- my dad got my sister and me a new puppy for Christmas. It was the most beautiful puppy I had ever seen. For about two minutes. Then, I wanted to get to the presents that mattered: the toys, man!

So, we spend however long it was to open the toys and to scream and yell and be merry. Then, when all was opened, we remembered that we had a dog. We looked all around for that dog, called for it (though it didn't yet have a name), and did all kinds of searching.

We finally found it "sleeping" next to the wall. My mom wouldn't let my sister or me pet it in fear of "waking it up." I never saw the dog again.

Heh.

...

Geez, that's depressing!

After that Christmas, I was working in broadcasting and have never spent a whole day at home over the holidays since.

Yep... since I was 4.

Well, it seems like it, anyway.


Remember how I said I would have a friend over and it would be 24 hours of "A Christmas Story"? Well, she called and cancelled. She won't be coming till this weekend.

Disappointed? Yeah, kinda. But I've had a lot of people renege on a lot of promises lately, so I am used to the disappointed.

She actually has a good excuse. So, I'm just looking forward to her visit, although it is a little later than I was expecting.

...

Geez... another depressing section.


In order to brighten things up, and to remember the needy and the soon-to-be-dead people of the world, this section will be written in the style of Osama bin Laden speak.

---

I have to work tomorrow. Allllll friggin' day. I have to wake up at 4:00am in order to get ready and be at work at 5:00am.

Praise Allah.

And did I mention that, in the morning, wind chill will be in the negative digits? And that I will probably just put on some jeans over my pajamas and don a cap because I'm too lazy to take a shower?

Allah is great.

But the real reason I will do that is because I haven't been to Wal-Mart in ages, and I am out of both soap and shampoo, so my hair is greasier than... well... Osama bin Laden's head after a week of turban wearing.

Ooo eee ooo ALLAH...

I would go to Wal-Mart right now, but I'm afraid I will get out in the cold, drive alllll the way to the Super Wal-Mart, and it will be closed. That would just suck.

...ting tang Allah-wallah bing bang.

So, looks like I'll be washing with dish soap until Wal-Mart opens back up. My ass will smell lemony fresh, and I won't have dishpan privates.

That Allah, man... he's da bomb.


Well, I'm officially out of things to talk about. Someone write me. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD... someone write me!

Merry Christmas, and all of that stuff.

10:09 p.m. - Mon., Dec. 24, 2001

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