mychai's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Parting is such sweet... I came home from work today. I was home later than usual because a coworker's mother had passed away, and so he didn't come into work today. I had to fill the extra time between my normal leaving time and the arrival time of the replacement. I'm cool like that. So, I walk into my house. I notice something is different. Out of the usual drabness of the place, I start to see brilliant colors. I hear giggling in the background. I feel I am no longer in Kansas. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just play along. Suddenly, the little people come out and start singing, "Ding Dong! The Bitch is Gone! which ol' bitch? The stinky ol' bitch! Ding Dong! The Cigarette-and-Weed Smoking, Doesn't Pay Her Bills, Steals Wine Glasses, Burps When I'm Eating, Puts Out Her Cigarette Butts on the Floor, Takes Advantage of My Kindess Bitch is Gone!" Them munchkins, dude. They can sing. So, I am officially living alone again. It has been a long while since I've actually seen her, but I have smelled her smoke and have dealt with the multitudes of fruit flies she was raising. She has been here. Oh. And she still owes me $180. I'm considering filing a small-claims suit. So, you may be seeing my Air Force ass on Judge Judy. I want to see her rip my ex roommie a new one. I did confiscate one of the only items that is worth something. It is her microwave. Since I don't ever use microwaves, this bad boy is going to Ye Olde Pawn Shop. I'll at least get some of my $180 back. So... I have exactly eight months left of freedom. Then it is off to boot camp for six weeks, tech school for a few more weeks, then I can have my freedom back. But I am talking about living on my own, wearing whatever I want to work, the world at my fingertips. FREEDOM. You better believe that I am going to live these eight months up. I am going to do more travelling than usual. I am going to try and go out more. I'm going to make my apartment into the best place in the world. As soon as I got those pesky munchkins out of my living room -- one of them made a "pile" in the corner -- I started cleaning and redecorating. My first task was to tackle the kitchen. I don't know how one errant roommate can attract so many damned fruit flies. But she did, and my goal was to eradicate the flies and the fruit they rode in on. Which is hard when there is no fruit anywhere in sight. But there were stacks upon stacks of dirty plastic cups. Those went in the garbage. And I took everything off of the counters and 409'd it all. Then out came the bleach. The front of my leg hair is all white, but dammit... if there is one ounce of biological material these flies could breed in, I'll be a... I'll be a.... I'll be sumfin, but I doubt I will be. Bleach pretty much takes care of everything. I then cleaned and slightly rearranged my living room. Later this week, I'll be moving my bookshelves from out of my bedroom and into there. If you have a knack for interior decorating, toss me a note. I could use your help. I went to yet another U. of Missouri football game this past weekend. I'm becoming a regular Mr. Football. Except this time, I sat with the band, which instantly knocks me right back down to geek status. Oh, well. It was that or sit with a coworker that smoked way too much crack in her heyday. Now she's just a whiney, bitchy idiot. No thanks. I'll take the band any ol' day. I ended up getting caught up with the staff, and I somehow ended up in the new, fancy press area. I got free drinks, free chips, and access to the best seats ever. They are air conditioned, baby! That was the highlight of the otherwise boring game. We beat them with a score of, like, 89-5 or something like that. It was rather boring. So, that was my weekend. By the way, les you forget, my birthday is in 14 DAYS. That's two weeks for all of you nitwits. You know what I ask for every stinkin' year and still have yet to get one? And it's the easiest gift in the world, too. I always ask for my friends to hand-write me a letter and include a picture of themselves. That's it. Nothing big. Heck, it doesn't even have to be a naked picture. But I have never gotten that. I do get cards from people, though, which is very nice. I love getting things like that where people spent just a few moments thinking only of me. I send out cards all of the time. Admittedly, they go out mainly to my Granny, Best Friend Lisa, and other relatives. I guess I should maybe branch out a bit more. On a similar topic, and my final word... I was reading on Metafilter about someone's cool idea of a joke. I don't see it as much of a joke as much as a fun way to keep myself entertained as well as make others feel kind of special. This guy gets random little treats -- a small, 50� stuffed animal, for instance -- and takes them to work. He puts them on different coworkers' desks without them knowing, and he doesn't leave a note or anything. That sounds like an aweful lot of fun. I'll have to try it. Just to hear the whirlwind of talk that it must spawn. 10:27 p.m. - Sun., Sept. 29, 2002 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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