mychai's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Boobs on My Back and Other Great Anecdotes Casinos suck. There has got to be an easier way of getting something for nothing than by spending three hours in front of a craps table only to lose all of the money you brought for the night. Which was, granted, only $35. That's a little more than ten dollars per hour for entertainment. The only other place you can get that kind of entertainment package is at Six Flags. At least the employees at the casino aren't pimply-faced sixteen year-old girls who care more about how the stud who works the "Stomach Launcher" looks than how much fun you are having. Nosirree bob. The employees at the casino are girls with UNGODLY amounts of cleavage hanging out of their little outfits who like to push those babies against your back when they bring you -- and get this -- free alcohol! Having unbelievable masses of cleavage pressed into your back while serving you free drinks, alone, is worth $35. And really, really good tips. Ah. It's good to be a man. Other than the casino, I had a decent enough time in Kansas City. We went and ate at this place called Fudrucker's. It has really good..... hamburgers. Yep. You read that right. We drove two hours just to eat a hamburger. But, in the others' defense, we also went by Krispy Kreme. The rumor is that we will be getting a Krispy Kreme here in Columbia. Which, at first, seemed like a dream come true. No longer would we Columbians have to drive for two hours just to get a delicious, hot, freshly-glazed donut that simply melts in your mouth in a delightful and addictive display of sugary goodness. Nope. As soon as they get it built, we can drive at most fifteen minutes across town and have that experience the second we crave it. But that's the problem. It will be here. In Columbia. No longer will we have much of a reason (or excuse) to go to St. Louis or Kansas City. No longer do we have a two-hour buffer between craving and attempting a donut binge. At least I won't be here. I'd get fat just by driving by. I've already had five people respond to the JP Postcard Project. Which is amazing! But, as usual, I want more! What is really kewl is that a girl from Brisbane signed up. You know... from Australia! The JP Postcard Project has officially gone international! You could totally be getting a nifty postcard advertising the wonders of the nude beaches of Australia. I don�t really know if they have nude beaches in Australia, but if they did, I�m sure they have postcards from it. And if you ask the girl, I bet she will find one and send it via international mail. Or post. Whatever those whacky Aussies call it these days. If you wanna sign up, go ahead and email me and get on the list. I figure I will push this for another week or so until I get a good number of people on the list. I will make a button/banner/something for you to put on your diaries so a lot of people will get involved. This will be more fun than... than... Man, I suck at that kind of witty bantor. I�ve decided I�m going to go get my hair cut. Really, really short. Have you seen Matt Lauer on the Today Show? He�s the handsome one. In other words, he�s not the one who keeps sticking cameras up her patootie so we can see her veinous colon (thanks, Roadiepig). I�m thinking of going with a Lauerian-style buzz. Not military short. Not even Matt Lauer short. But close to it. My hair has never looked right. I have a rather bulbous head. I have to wear XL caps because of this massive melon I have growing out of my shoulders. And I think guys my age look a little better when they have really short hair. So, I am going to take the razor to it and get it short. I�ll take pictures when I am done. And finally... I signed up for classes yesterday. Well, officially, I signed up for a single class. I will be taking another class but won�t be getting credit for it. Mostly because I�ve taken it before. I really loved the class. And the professor teaching it is one of my favorites. The reason I am taking it again is because the first time taking it was online, and it blew cow balls. I�m talking about Creative Writing: Poetry. You just can�t teach a successful creative writing class online. So, I am just going to start showing up for class. This particular teacher said she would be delighted. This is the teacher whose final I skipped due to an unfortunate butt surgery I had last October. She still gave me an �A�. What a kewl woman. The other class I�m taking is a grammar and history of English class. It�s with a teacher I absolutely dispise. From what I hear, she�s not the most loved faculty member by her coworkers, either. At least I�m not alone in my hate. Classes start on Tuesday. Hell Day will be Tuesday. Just so you know. I�ll chat at you later. For now, I really must get to the john before something bad happens. 11:16 a.m. - Thurs., Jan. 9, 2002 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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