mychai's Diaryland Diary

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I need you to help me with a decision

Ok. An extended metaphor of such:

I think it is well known that I like going to the casino. Each trip walking into the well-lit, active floor is such a thrill. It's like going to an arcade for adults. Actually... it really is going to an adult arcade.

But when I go to the casino, I usually skip the "arcade games" (slots, for all of you slow-pokes) and head over to the table games. I plop down my money, get my chips, and -- depending on the game -- I either sit down or mark my standing ground and get to betting.

Sometimes you win a lot. Sometimes you lose it all. It all depends how the statistics are leaning on that particular night. And it also depends on how much money you have.

Regardless, you have to know when to cash in your chips and walk away. Even when you aren't doing so well on a particular night, you can still walk away with your chips at a certain point and still feel like a winner. It's just having that instinct to know when to thank the dealer, toss him or her a chip or two as a tip, and say goodbye.

As is how I am feeling with a lot of things in my life at the moment.

Here's where I am:

  • I am working at a job that, at best, I only used to enjoy. Any more, it pays my bills, giving me enough to live alone and enjoy a few luxuries. Other than that, it is highly unfulfilling and, especially as of late, a major pain in my ass.

  • I am going to school that I really, really enjoy. I love my classmates. I love my teachers. I am learning a lot (I never could and never will be able to spell, so get off my back), and am having a blast. But I am coming to an end of my schooling, and my college, though wonderful as it is, doesn't offer a ton of higher-level English courses at night. It's dwindled down to their offering of only one class I can take per quarter. As you know, I've resorted to just showing up to classes that I've already had just because I like the teacher or enjoyed the class.

  • I have a good chunk of money in my savings account and an itching to go around the country and, more or less, play.

I'm at a point where I am seriously contemplating cashing in my proverbial chips and walking away before leaving for the Air Force.

My reasoning being that I could pack up my stuff, store it, and get out of here mid-March. That would leave me with a healthy stash of cash that I could travel with for two months before getting sent off to boot camp. I've always wanted to see the West Coast. I have several people along the East Coast I would like to meet. I also have some good friends who live over there as well. I wouldn't mind catching a flight from New York and heading over to England for a week or two. Maybe fly around to wherever my friend Carrie is working on a particular week and visit with her.

And then My Best Bud Ever Marcus is living -- get this -- on a f'n YACHT in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, doing nothing but writing. He said I could come and stay with him for a while. We'd be like the Modernists sitting in France, drinking absynth, and doing nothing but writing for days. God, that sounds great!

So... should I stay here at a job I don't really like and am majorly burned out with? Or should I pack up my bags and get truckin' for my last few months of relative freedom?

Email me and tell me what you think.

Oh. I could bring my laptop along and update from the road if that is the decision I make.


I went to eat at a Chinese place today with my girl Megan. Yeah... she hasn't updated in a while. Anyway, we went to eat at a new Chinese place right across the street.

It was... so-so.

She hasn't ever had sushi or sashimi, so next week we will be going to one of my favorite sashimi places. I will break her into the world of eating completely raw fish. She will freak when they put the still-flopping goldfish right in front of her!

I kid, I kid.

I'm contemplating doing what Best Friend Lisa did to me when I was with her for the first time I ever ate sashimi. She put a big glob of wasabi on a chopstick and told me to suck it down. If you've ever had wasabi, you know the "humor" in that.

Megan's a cute, cute girl. She's one-half Rory Gilmore (though I think Lorelei Gilmore is completely hottt), one-half Bridget Jones. Plus, she is a total foodie. Pretty much all we talked about was food and how to make it. I've known her for quite a while. At the very least a year. Probably more. She's a fun one.


Remember to tune in tomorrow. I have a very neat, fun, visually-stimulating entry planned. It is promising to be a very fun read for all of yas.

I've told only one Diarylander about it. And she said, and I quote exactly, "Obviously, I'm looking forward to it." Which she tags saying, "Eh, I'm so damn eloquent."

So, there ya go. Tune in tomorrow. It'll be a load of JP-inspired fun! And tell all of your friends. They, too, will love it. Especially if your friends are single, in their mid-to-upper 20s, and are hottt.


Ok. That's it for me for tonight. The 13 hours of sleep I got last night are beginning to fade now that it is almost 2:00 in the morning.

I'm not a machine, ya know. Sheesh.

12:29 p.m. - Thurs., Feb. 13, 2003

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