mychai's Diaryland Diary

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IC#2: Acceptance Speech for Winning Oscar

It was a sunny day. So sunny, in fact, that the sun seemed to keep the clouds away. I had gotten the call -- the big announcement -- and I was on my way to this magical land full of famous personalities of different colors and talents. Everyone seemed nice. Just downright sweet.

Yes. I was on my way to where even the air seemed sweet.

I was to go to the "CTW" building, whatever that was. I had previously gotten directions off of the Internet. I went to Ask Jeeves and had to type in, "Can you tell me how to get to" so-and-so street. Amazingly enough, for my one brief search, Ask Jeeves didn't completely suck.

The directions drove me through this neighborhood. There was a store on the corner, a few apartment buildings, kids jumping rope... Your typical neighborhood.

The reason I was here: I had won an oscar.

Namely, THE Oscar.

Last name: the Grouch.

The telegram I had gotten said that, "Mr. the Grouch had been regrettably evicted from his garbage can resort due to new building codes and a management unwilling to make repairs. All of the residents living on Sesame Street -- unwilling to either take Mr. the Grouch into their homes nor toss him out on said Street -- decided to hold a contest and give Mr. the Grouch to the winner."

Lucky me.

All I had to do was to go to the "CTW" building and make a quick acceptance speech and take home my new Oscar.

It's an ugly job. But I guess it would be mean to toss the old greenster to the curb. What with all of the kids around and everything.

Into the microphone I spoke:

"Dear ladies, gentlemen, birds, elephants, and other monsters of this particular 'other side of the tracks.' I came expecting... well, not expecting anything. But I can honestly say I was surprised after flying in from St. Louis. And boy, are my arms tired!

<silence. a lone cricket chirps in the distance >

Ahem. Ok. Well, I do wish to thank all of you for picking my name out of the stack of 14 total entries, though I do think your advertisement of 'Win a trip to the Oscars' was a bit misleading.
I wish to thank all of the little people for helping me achieve this honor; looking at all of you in the crowd, I think that pretty much includes all of you. Well, except for the bird. So, thanks to all of yas. As my final acceptance bit-o-fun, I will now do the Elmo Dance! Everyone join in!"

After my brief stay on the street named after an oil, I decided I should head back to the island with my other cast aways. Before I made it back, though, I dropped off Oscar with my mom so she could look after him.

On my way home, I realized he came with a worm as well. A talking worm. I now don't know who I like best.

Before leaving for the island, I took some polaroids of my new best friend so I could show my survivor mates. What do you guys think?

10:15 p.m. - Tues., Mar. 19, 2002

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