mychai's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm pissy. Thanks for asking. Ok. Here's your cotton-pickin' entry. I'm kinda grumpy tonight. I think the person next to me on my flight back to Missouri gave me a bug. I'm coughing. I have a sore throat. And I just don't feel like doing shit. So, I'm writing my diary. And it'll be extra grouchy tonight. So, to all of the fans of "Grumpy JP," this one's for you. Thanksgiving: Flew home, drove to Florida, saw family, ate, came home, flew back here to Missouri. On the drive back from Florida, I rode in the van with my dad, step-mom, and her parents. Let me take a brief moment to describe my step-grandmother. Imagine Kramer, from Seinfeld. Now, remove the laugh track and add saggy boobs. There: that's my step-grandma. I love her to death, and from a distance, I think her ideas are humorous and quirky and funny. But try driving for six fucking hours with someone trying to toss ideas around about how to make a poinsettia out of Thanksgiving leftovers. I wrapped my fingers around my neck and passed out when she decided that sliced bread covered in salad greens would be the leaves and cranberry sauce would be the berries of the poinsettia. She's also one of these super conservative holy-rollers. She kept trying to convert me. And she hates Harry Potter. It's all full of witchcraft and majik and everything evil. It's Satan's plot to take over the world, and he's starting with the kids. Well, forgive my beezelbubed ass for even bringing it up. So, I got witnessed to. I dozed off in the middle of my Bible message. I'm sure that pissed her off. So, yeah... Six hours of a messianic Kramer with boobs. Don't get me wrong. I had a great visit. I will write more about the things I did when I'm not so pissy. On a few higher notes... I saw My Good Friend Kourtney. It was sure good to see her. We went and watched Harry Potter together. This was on Tuesday, when I had been up for 22 hours straight. I was able to stay awake during the movie, but I had to have Kourtney take me promptly home and tuck me in. I was pooped. I also spent a lot of time with Daisy, the Dog. Man, I've missed her. I don't think she left my side the whole time I was there. I don't think she has forgivin me for leaving her like I did. So, I get home, and everything has gone to shit. Shit, I tell ya. I'm completely broke. More broke than I had imagined. It helps when you look through all of your bank notes every now and then. So, I'm going to have to give up the pleasure of living alone. No more open-curtained showers. No more making PB&J sandwiches in my undies. This completely sucks. But I'll be moving in with Lisa in a few months anyway, so I guess it will be good training to get me used to living with someone again. I have a girl already looking. I'm doing everything I can to sweet-talk her into taking the room. Because, if she takes the room: Voila! Financial worries solved. If she doesn't, I'm in deep doo-doo. And I don't know how I'll get out of the doo-doo. Things usually work out, so I'm not too worried. But New Potential Roommate Chick would sure make things easy for me. Dear God: I promise I'll never read or watch any more Harry Potter if you will just PLEEEEASE let this person move in to my apartment. I promise I will never look at porn again. And I promise to never again flip off the anti-war people who stand on the corner on my way to work. I know they just mean well. Ahhhhh-Mehhhhhn So, if you have any money to spare, please send it my way. I'll be most grateful. If you are ever in Missouri, I'll cook you a gourmet dinner like you wouldn't believe. And, yes, I'll put on all of my clothes when I do it. Damn picky bastards. 7:54 p.m. - Sunday, Nov. 25, 2001 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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